I've been thinking about Spoilers lately. I wrote up a very small snippet about the movie Devil in which I might have given away the BIG SECRET as to who the bad guy was.* My buddy Lance (gently) took me to task about that**, and I started to think- is giving away a plot point really that detrimental to a film? Can a movie still be watchable if you know the BIG TWIST that happens in it? Well, as with all things, I think it depends on the movie. Or, rather, if the movie is any good.
Let's talk Devil. Not really all that great a movie. But it was sold in such a way that hinged on the question: "which one of these people is the killer?" Or, I guess, "which one of these people is the DEVIL? Bwa-ha-haaaaa!" But even suggesting that that was what the movie was about is ridiculous. And spoiler-y, actually. That one of them was the devil in disguise (oh, yes you are) should have been a secret. Yes, I know it was the title of the movie, but the way the concept was introduced was actually quite effective. Or would have been if they didn't give it away by selling the movie on it. And why did they make it such a point to try and hook you in with the idea that you needed to figure out which annoying douche in the elevator was a murderous demon? Is it maybe because the movie was so weak that it had to be sold on a gimmick? Yes. Yes it was. That.
I saw The Crying Game back in '92. Not the first movie to feature a (penis) plot twist, but I think it's where the whole craze started. Gene Siskel famously revealed the (penis) BIG SECRET on his & Ebert's "Memo To The Academy" show. The latter was pissed. But why? I mean, the (penis) movie had been out for months already. And those guys had a show about discussing films, for chrissake. And The Crying Game is a really, really good movie that people wanted to talk about. Tiptoeing around the (penis) BIG REVEAL that late in the game would have been detrimental to discussion. If you hadn't seen The Crying Game by the time Siskel whipped it out, chances are you weren't the type of moviegoer that cared about such things. The secret that there was a secret was already out, so if you were interested you would have gotten your ass to the movies and seen it for yourself. Was is shocking? Sure. Did it enhance the visceral experience of the film when the BIG REVEAL happened? Yes... sort of.*** Does it mean that now that I've seen it I can never watch and enjoy the damned thing again? Of course not. Did finding out who Keyser Söze was make me never want to watch The Usual Suspects again? No WAY. If anything, it made me want to get right back in line to see how they cleverly weaved the plot around that character for an entire movie. Same with The Sixth Sense.
…and let's talk M. Night Schuleramaringtone: a guy who built his rep on big plot twists, then fell victim to them. By the time The Village came out everyone was so much more interested in what the BIG PLOT TWIST was going to be than the movie itself. I remember seeing the trailer for it and immediately my brain kicked into high gear trying to figure out what the BIG SECRET was. And, of course, I did. We all did. And we all still went to see it. Now, whether that movie stands up on its own once you know the secret is debatable (I say yes. I liked it… but, sadly, The Village was his last stand. And it wasn't a considerably strong last stand), but the point still remains: the story took a back seat to the BIG REVEAL, which watered down the plot simply because the twist became more important. Hell, the guy even tried to distract us with a red-herring twist ("what is the big, bad wolf?") first, to obfuscate the bigger twist at the end. It, uh… didn't work, M.
And on that same topic, remember Scream 3? I mean, if you're like me you've tried to scrub the memory from your brain, but were unsuccessful. But remember Scream 3? They were completely out of ideas at that point, so guessing who the killer was was simply a "who's still alive?" issue. I remember hearing that the actors all received different copies of the script with different endings. You know what? If it's that interchangeable, don't expect me to take the shit seriously. Hell, they even did a crappy fake reveal where McDumbass from that hospital show gives an (out of character) evil smile towards the camera as if to say, "yup. It's ME this time," and then a few seconds later he gets stabbed, or pummeled, or something by the real killer (a character that, if I remember correctly, had almost no (if any) screen time before his reveal). What a cheap-ass out-of-context way to try and throw the audience off. It was like a watered down red herring. A pink herring. A perfect example of how useless plot twists can be if you're using them to simply go through the motions. Don't waste our time with crap like that- we're too smart.
Anyway, having said all that, if you walk out of a movie and start yelling, "he was a ghost the whole time!" to the people waiting in line, you're an asshole. Don't rob people of their right to be surprised. However, if you read a review of a movie before you see it, and something is given away, that's just too damned bad, Jack. Chances are you were reading the review to decide whether or not to go see the blessed thing in the first place, which really boils down to you wanting your experience colored before you go. That's how reviewers make a living. If you see that your favorite reviewer has given a movie 1 out of 5 stars, there's a good chance you won't go****, or you will go, but with preconceived notions that will likely "enhance" your viewing experience. I don't usually read reviews before seeing a movie for this very reason. If Mr. Ebert or that dude on NY1 or the boys & girls at CHUD.com like or dislike something, all I'm going to see when I go to the theater is the stuff they pointed out. Sure, I can form my own opinions after the fact, but while I'm sitting there in the dark I'm waiting for the next point that I read about to pop up and stick out like a sore thumb instead of experiencing it organically. Reviews, for me, are so much better AFTER I see a movie. I can agree or disagree, but reading someone else's point of view is always a great way to expand your mind once you've already formed your own opinions. That way you can jump into the discussion from a place of knowledge.
So, yeah, spoilers, man. To recap:
A) if you truly don't want to know about a movie, don't read about it before you see it. People shouldn't have to write SPOILER ALERT on their articles and stuff- by now it's implied.
B) if you don't see a movie in the first few weeks it's been released, don't get mad if someone is discussing it and gives something away. If you're late to a party you can't expect everyone to stop drinking, sober up, leave, come back and start all over again. And,
C) if you find out the BIG REVEAL beforehand, consider that it's only the secret that's been spoiled, not the whole movie. If it turns out it IS the whole movie that's been spoiled, then the movie probably blows.
*I don't feel bad about spoiling Devil for two reasons: 1. It was pretty obvious from the trailer for the film that they were going to go with the most "shocking" choice and, 2. it's a movie that wants you to guess who it is but gives you absolutely ZERO clues right up until the reveal. You're not meant to be able to figure it out. Which is why, ultimately, it was a waste of time.
**Lance, if you're reading, I want to be clear- this was not intended to be a rant against you. You simply got my juices flowing on the subject.
***was it really that mind-blowing to find out it was a dude? C'mon. Like your spider-sense is THAT fucking dull.
****For the record- if you're thinking about seeing a movie and you happen to read one of my reviews that trashes it, know that I am never, never, ever telling you to skip said movie. When it comes to films I'm definitely an advocate of empiricism above authoritarianism (yeah, like I'm an authority on ANYTHING). Think about the times you've loved a movie and then read a bad review of it somewhere that made you say, "that guy doesn't know what he's talking about." I'm sure this has happened to you (like my friend Tom who HATED Black Swan and was dumbfounded by my love for it). Basically, what I'm saying here is don't be a follower, man.
P.S. Penis.
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